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The Great Golden Cluck

Operation: The Great Golden Cluck
Robot of the Day: Giant octopus
Destroyed by: Speedy Cerviche ---- Ginzu Sword
It's a busy day in Little Tokyo, and Speedy's delivering a dangerous cargo: your standard pizza.  However, he never gets the chance to deliver that pizza: out of nowhere, a giant apparition appears over the populace.....SLOWLY.  Is it invisible?  Nope, I guess not....it's a giant fire-breathing demon!  Wrong again....it's just a giant golden chicken.  Or, as Speedy said, "Tweety Bird on hormones."  When it stops, a disguised Bad Bird appears, claiming that this machine can see the future, read fortunes, and grant any wish whatsoever.  If that were true, I would wish that some of the dubbed plots weren't so ridiculous.

Anyway, Bad Bird urges everyone to buy a ticket in order to have the Cluck do what the townsfolk are hoping for.  Speedy believes at the outset that it's a scam, but then notices that an elderly couple have decided to take the bait.  The wife of the couple pays every cent she has, hoping to cure her husband's back problem.  Once the ticket is inserted inside the phone booth, a number begins dwindling down towards 0.  It halts abruptly at 5; and suddenly, the old man's back is straightened out, and he begins dancing again.  (Anyone recognize the background music at this point?)  And just like that, EVERYONE decides to go after a ticket, Speedy included (although he has to push himself off the ground first).  The pizza he was supposed to deliver has been flattened by the crowd, and he rushes off in despair.  Ol' Cerviche moves so quickly that he doesn't even hear the snickering couple from earlier, getting paid by a Ninja Crow for their actions.

Back at the pizza parlor, Polly is less than pleased with Speedy's failure and proceeds to chew him out, with Guido offering snide remarks every now and then.  First, Speedy's lie with the wrong script; then Polly's screech, with orders to clean up the washrooms and make them look spic-'n'-span (probably WITH Spic-n-Span, no doubt).  Guido nails Speedy with this remark: "I always knew your career would end up in the tiolet."  As he straightens up the washroom, Speedy begins daydreaming about Lucille.  Just as the daydream proceeds to the point where he's about to kiss her, he snaps back to reality and realizes that he's had a facefirst encounter with the mop.  

Even as a janitor, Speedy is all washed up.

Meanwhile, the Cluck is the talk of the town.  People are a little too eager to spend their hard-earned money on a giant chicken that's not named Chicken Boo.  One of the citizens demands that the "Big Bird" go back to public television.  Boats arrive from around the planet (or maybe just the immediate vicinity) in order to seek out the G.G.C. so that the sailors can find out what they're going to be.  And guess where all their money goes.....yup, two points for guessing "The Big Cheese" and "Jerry Atrick".  After remarking on the success of this scheme, Jerry suggests that Seymour take swimming lessons.  Seymour states in response that he's going to be the richest character in cartoons.  No, not as rich as Bugs Bunny after inheriting "A million box".

Speedy approaches, wanting to buy a ticket.  Right when the person in front of him leaves, he gets dejected----the robot and crew are taking a lunch break.  The cat spies a ticket on the ground and goes for, but Bad Bird reels it in, stating that it's not right that Cerviche would try to steal that.  After Speedy has brief intellectual conversation with him, Guido leaps in, nails Speedy, and tries to pay for the ticket himself.  Speedy recovers and tackles him, instigating a fight.  Bad Bird departs the scene with the PCs' money in tow.

(commercial break)

Francine wants to have Guido deliver a pizza, but finds out that he's a little tied up at the moment.  Back at the Cluck, the victorious Speedy tries again, wishing that he and Lucille were together.  But guess what happens?  The same thing that happens to people all over the country in shopping malls....NOT ENOUGH CREDIT!!!  At the Cheese's hideout, the greedy Seymour decides he's not happy with his current allotment.  Jerry informs him that the Cluck's been invited to the home of a rich guy (Old Man Monkey Bags) with a fancy security system.  Apparently, the chimp's paranoid about his money, and he wants the Cluck's advice.

Speedy tries again to meet up with Lucille wanting to see if his wish came true or not (though with the insufficient credit, one can never be too sure ^_^).  He's cut off at the pass by a deer who walks off with the goat.  Meanwhile, the people aren't too pleased about the Cluck leaving, but as we find out, it has decided to relocate to the home of the rich chimpanzee.  Bad Bird claims that Monkey Bags will no longer have to worry about his financial investments (once they're stolen, anyway).  As Cerviche bemoans his lack of success, he spies the Cluck and demands a refund---but is forced to hide behind a barrel once a Ninja Crow comes barreling out off the rich man's property.  Speedy snatches the crow and forces him to start talking, eventually succeeding in landing a call to Big Al Dente.  The big dog passes on the information to Francine and the others, and Speedy arrives back at the pizza parlor.  TRANSFORMATION SEQUENCE!

(commercial break)

Francine launches the Cats while dishing out another line in her witty repertoire of launch remarks.  Once Monkey Bags is asleep, Bad Bird decides to rob the chimp blind (and in the original KNT episode, they actually do just that).  The SPC arrive, however, and make their entrance while insulting BB's breath at the same time.  However, he refuses to pay for a pizza he didn't even order and launches an attack on the Cats.  Bad move, bird brain----with a one and a two and a three, the Ninja Crows are history.  The golden chicken splits right down the middle; and with a cascade of golden armor, the robot's true identity is revealed: a giant white, brown, and red octopus with a beak.  Whether Bad Bird's remark about having the neatest monsters is true or not, I have to say one thing: it certainly does look....strange.

The 3 Cats are immediately on the defensive, trying to dodge each of the robot's tentacles.  Eventually, one of them snags Polly (Bad Bird: "Polly want a cracker?"), then does likewise with Guido.  Angered, Speedy attempts to take the fight to the robot, but gets snagged before he reaches it.  Not having any other choice, he uses his cat bell to ring up Francine back at the parlor.  Acting immediately, she dials the fearsome leader of the Rescue Team, General Catton, and sends him off towards the octopus.

Sheesh...this guy's bigger than Wildcat, and
that's saying quite a bit.

Back at the fight, things aren't faring so well.  Guido and Polly's heads are getting bashed together, and Speedy is living up to a cat's natural dislike of water.  Catton abruptly arrives, blasting the robot's tentacles with his dual cannon set and freeing the main SPC.  After an ultimatum, he fires again and tears open the robot from the inside-out.  Bad Bird abruptly decides to call a retreat.  He doesn't get far, however, when a ticked-off Speedy lays waste to the robot with his Cat's Eye Slash.

Seymour decides to see who can get the angriest and self-destructs again, but according to him, it's not as powerful as usual.  The Narrator concludes the episode by stating that the SPC will always be there to stop evil in its tracks----just as the roof that Speedy is standing on breaks, causing him to plummet once again.


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